January 16, 2012
My drive back up from San Diego:
Majestic rays protruding from the clouds as the fog clears.
The grand Pacific ocean on my left.
My view from the rear view mirror: Jack and Steven with mouths agaped, fast asleep. So cute.
To my right: Tammy in shotgun curled up in the corner, also fast asleep. Sooo cute.
Singing along with my favorite worship songs while zooming along a traffic-less freeway...for another 10 hours.
All this after an intense weekend of none but Jesus.
It's rare for me to have moments like this. Moments when my heart sings, "This is the way life should be."
Just three days prior, I started listening the David Crowder's final album. As Crowder sang "Oh great God, give us rest," my eyes watered. Oh, how I thirsted for it it. Not physical sleep, but the peace that surpasses all understanding. All I was feeling was the torment that comes in an overthinking prayerless life.
It was comforting to see the college kids sleeping, at rest. My coworkers love watching their kids sleep. I looove watching my sister sleep, and sitting on her when she's sleeping.
In the same way, I bet God loves to see us at rest.
I get tired trying to impress. Trying to earn my worth. It's exhausting to be someone I'm not. For the majority of my life, I've been trying to meet a made-up standard for myself that I cannot attain. And to make it worse, I hide my insecurities behind a busy schedule. I have this aptitude for falling into a pit called of the "pride of busy-ness."
Yet the truth of the gospel is that rest only comes in the forgiveness of Christ on the cross. Rest comes in the acceptance offered by grace at your worst. Rest is believing so deep within your heart that the standard is met only in His perfect righteousness. And in Him, I am perfect. Rest is Truth, and the freedom that comes with it. It's a beautiful humble confidence.
This is my God.
:)
Wanna see something else that's almost as cute as sleeping college students?
Click. Heheeheheee.
